The Uplifters
The Uplifters
Are you participating or observing?

Are you participating or observing?

With Author and Coach, Beth Raynor Webb

Hello Uplifters!

Listen to our latest episode in the player here, on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcasts. Watch us on YouTube

Our guest today is Beth Raynor Webb. Beth grew up in a world that had strong opinions about what girls could and couldn’t do. She married young, started a family, and followed the path that was laid out for her.

When her kids left the nest, she began to ask herself some big questions: “Who am I really? What have I not done that I really wanted to do?” She realized that she’d spent most of her life caring for others, supporting them in their dreams, but not actively participating in life. She was an observer.

“There's nothing more empowering than becoming a participant in whatever it is that you find joy in. When we get into a participant mindset, we stop just dreaming and we start doing.” Beth Raynor Webb

So, Beth decided to start doing things, especially those that scared her. She took up hiking and kayaking and cooking, she moved across the country, and now, she’s looking straight into the eyes of a fear that she’s held since she was a little girl: horses. 

Fear is contagious, but so is uplifting.

So, if you want to catch some of Beth’s courageous and participatory mojo, here are some things you might want to experiment with:

  1. Understand the source of the fear with compassion for its’ context

  2. Suss out whether your fear is there to save you or stop you

  3. Find a safe space and a capable teacher or another source of support for facing your fear in small steps

  4. Celebrate all of the wins and learnings

  5. Stop when it’s no longer serving you. It's okay to dive in, and it's okay to climb out.

After you listen, join Beth and me and a host of other uplifting women over at Live Up Daily to continue the conversation. And if you find value in this episode, please leave us a review and share this episode with your friends and colleagues who might benefit from Beth’s story.


A little about Beth

Beth Raynor Webb has been a weight loss leader, trained personal coach, and certified Focus coach since 2013. After living over fifty years in upstate New York, she and her husband embraced adventure and moved to the beautiful southwest and now reside in El Paso, TX. She enjoys travel, hiking with her Yorkie, off-roading, and loves spending time with her children and greatest inspiration…her granddaughter. Learn more about Beth and her work with Blue Owl Solutions.

A Messy Transcript of This Episode, for those who prefer to read it.

Aransas Savas (00:05.733)

Hello, welcome to the Uplifters podcast. I'm your host, Aransas Savas, and this is the show where we talk to the Uplifters, the women among us who live their lives with courage and passion and purpose, and through the honest stories that they share with us help us tap into our own courage and passion and purpose.

Today we are joined by Beth Raynor Webb. And Beth is someone I've known for a long time and have been deeply inspired by. Her book, Everyone Has a Mountain, is a powerful exploration of so many uplifting themes. She's been a life coach for 10 years. She leads the company Blue Owl Solutions that delivers powerful coaching to women and men who aim to maximize their own health and wellbeing. But Beth is a human being, like all of us, and she is not perfect. She is not fearless. She has fears, very real and present fears, like all of us, that she is learning her way through.

Aransas Savas (01:27.761)

And Beth is actively looking her fear in the eye right now. And so in this episode, we're going to talk to her about her fears and about what it's been like to face them head on. And we're going to look at it through a lens that actually is a fear that is far more common than I maybe realized. I actually have a couple of clients right now who are facing this very same fear. And so it felt like just such a powerful opportunity for us to journey through this fear with Beth and see what it means for all of us as we face our own fears, whether they are the same or vastly different. And the thing I think that is super interesting about this particular fear is that this fear like so many of our fears has a flip side. It is something that for so many people is a dream. And what we're talking about here is horses. Horses, I'm fascinated by because they hold this really mystical, mythical position in our culture. They are revered and admired for their strength and their speed and their soulfulness, and yet it's those same qualities that for many people are the source of tremendous fear. And while so many of the images that we see of horses are, you know, I don't know when I picture them, I picture like Merida from Brave on a horse with her hair flying off behind her in search of freedom and agency. And yet for so many people, it is something very

very different.

Aransas Savas (03:30.553)

So today, let's talk to Beth about what it's like to journey from fear to maybe some little taste of that freedom. Beth, thank you so much for being here today.

Beth Webb (03:51.354)

Oh, it's an absolute honor. Thank you for having me. Yes.

Aransas Savas (03:56.689)

So... horses. When did this fear start for you? What is your earliest memory of it?

Beth Webb (04:00.534)

Horses. Yes.

Beth Webb (04:08.274)

Yeah, so I have to go all the way back to when I was a very small girl. I lived in upstate New York and I had a dad who was always bringing crazy things home with him from work. And one day he showed up with a donkey. And in my little tiny girl brain,

Somehow I connected donkeys and horses like it was all the same. But I also had a mom who was very nervous. And there was a constant, oh, don't let her go near that thing. It's going to bite her. Don't let her go near it. And of course, my dad took me right over to it. And what did it do? It tried to bite me. So from that moment on, I just had this.

fear of anything that looked or sounded like a horse. And it never made much of a difference until I moved to the Southwest, when horses became a very big deal to everyone and everything around me, the community here.

Aransas Savas (05:16.381)

Interesting. So what are horses like in the Southwest? And this is a new move for you, right?

Beth Webb (05:22.446)

Yes. So I think that we have this picture, those of us who grow up in the East, we think of the Wild West, and we think of cowboys and cowgirls. And I think you even used the word freedom when you were describing horses. And literally living in a place now where I am surrounded by ranches and cattle and horses and real live cowboys. And I have a pattern in my life since I have been on this journey of self-discovery to just challenge myself with everything that scares me. And that has taken many shapes and forms. But I knew once I got out here.

Um, that this, this getting over the fear of horses was going to have to be one of those fears I conquered.

Aransas Savas (06:28.289)

And so what was the dream for you? What motivated you to want to face this fear?

Beth Webb (06:37.413)

It's not a want. I wouldn't call facing fears a want.  It's a challenge. So part of my story is knowing that many years ago, about more than a decade now, I decided to get healthy, get well.

Beth Webb (06:55.970)

And part of being well and part of being healthy is more than just physical. Part of it is mental. And growing up with a mindset of constantly being afraid of everything and told that it's not your place to do certain things, young ladies don't participate in certain things.

Beth Webb (07:21.886)

And my choices were I could either be a secretary, I could be a teacher, or I could be a nurse. Those were my choices. So as I started this journey of wellness, yes, the physical side of it was part of it. But I knew I had to start embracing parts of my authentic self that had been tampered by culture and tampered by the expectations for the roles that I could play as a woman. And so taking on these fears and conquering these fears is my way of discovering my authentic self. It's my way of figuring out who I could be once I gave myself permission to be more.

Beth Webb (08:27.138)

So the ultimate goal was, yes, to be able to jump on a horse and ride off into the sunset with that magical freedom that we all talk about with horses. The reality was I was so afraid of them that just to walk up to them and lead them on a rope was terrifying. And so I found a place and people that supported a beginner and was willing to take me on and started taking the steps to overcome that fear.

Aransas Savas (09:05.613)

I want to go back to this sort of overarching story here of you deciding that you wanted to get healthy, you wanted to embrace life fully, and you said, find my authentic self. Why was that so important to you?

Beth Webb (09:28.686)

I think because it had been tampered for so long. I was married very early, had my family very early. I took on the roles that I was supposed to take on, being of the generation that I was. And I grew up surrounded by I'm one of three girls. My mom is one of four girls. Her mom is one of four girls.

Beth Webb (09:56.146)

I have these incredible aunties and grandmothers and sisters. And I very early on understood that there was this dichotomy between the characteristics I saw in them. They were these strong, talented, creative women. And yet the life applications they were afforded were different.

Beth Webb (10:25.486)

than what those characteristics were. And I also grew up in a time when Title IX had just come about. I was in elementary school when all of the sudden, I could now participate in sports.

Aransas Savas (10:29.387)


Beth Webb (10:46.842)

And I remember wanting to do all of these crazy things. I also have middle child syndrome. So I was the tomboy. I was the son my father never had. I wanted, I was one of the first girls in my school to take the shop class instead of home economics. I wanted to play all the sports and be on all the boys' teams. I remember being very angry.

Aransas Savas (11:05.534)


Beth Webb (11:16.514)

that the girls teams got these crummy little t-shirts and the boys got full uniforms. So I grew up with a lot of anger about things, but didn't understand it, didn't understand how to process it, didn't understand what it meant to me personally. And so it wasn't until my kids were kind of grown and gone that I said,

Who am I? What do I really want to do? And what did I want to do then that I didn't get to do? And so that's where this need, I find myself saying that I spent a lot of my life being an observer. And I was a motivator. And I was an inspirer because I was cheering people on constantly.

But I was cheering them on in a way that was not by example. It was just by being there and observing. And so it was time to take a step and start doing things. And so do things I do. You know, now I just do and do. And if it scares me, that's all the better. And so this fear of horses, you know, came out when I realized that there were all these opportunities for trail riding here in the southwest.

Beth Webb (12:49.010)

And so little by little, little by little, you get closer, and then you get on, and you learn about horses, and you learn about yourself while you're learning about horses. And it still scares me every time I go for a lesson, because they push me to do things that I didn't do the week before, you know? And I said, well, what could be better than let's just go ahead and buy a horse?

Aransas Savas (13:04.293)


Beth Webb (13:22.382)

Yeah, and I did. I bought a horse. And so now just about every day I go and I put myself in a situation where I'm discovering who he is and he's teaching me confidence. He's teaching me abilities that I wished I had had my whole life.

Aransas Savas (13:22.857)

And you did. You bought a horse. And you did. You bought a horse.

Beth Webb (13:51.170)

I meet young girls and I see them insecure and I see them fighting the stereotypes. I say you can do this, you can do this, it doesn't matter if you're afraid, just go do it anyway.

Aransas Savas (14:07.897)

What a beautiful message to demonstrate through your life.

Beth Webb (14:14.550)

Yeah, yeah. I figure it's better to empower people by example than it is to just give them words. Because then you can say, well, if I can do this, then you can do that. It's real. It's tactile.

Aransas Savas (14:15.705)


Aransas Savas (14:23.069)


Aransas Savas (14:25.585)


Aransas Savas (14:32.793)

And you talk about learning about yourself through learning the horse. What do you mean by that?

Beth Webb (14:40.782)

Horses are, by nature, extremely nervous beings. They are not aggressive in any way. And yet, many people are hurt by horses because they don't take the time to understand them. Horses are inquisitive, but they are scared easily. And so I felt I had a kinship to them.

Aransas Savas (15:07.703)

Oh, yes, me too.

Beth Webb (15:09.646)

Right? I mean, they're very, very flighty. They spook. And it's the craziest things. One of the first things that I did with my horse was lead it around the big arena. And he was afraid of a shadow that was in one corner. So we had to stop, and we had to pause, and we had to breathe. And how important is learning to stop and pause and breathe?

Beth Webb (15:36.746)

You know, that's a lesson that who knew I would get that at a horseback riding lesson. Yeah.

Aransas Savas (15:42.437)

Who knew? And who knew you could feel so seen by seeing that very natural and understandable survival instinct in another animal?

Beth Webb (15:46.356)


Beth Webb (15:56.190)

Right? Right. Yep. Yep.

Aransas Savas (16:00.765)

I think so much of fear is misunderstood. We feel like there's something wrong with us for having fear, but just like all emotion, it makes sense. There is a reason for our emotion and our experience of fear and anger and happiness and all of the vast emotions that we experience.

Aransas Savas (16:29.857)

And the thing that I think gets muddled oftentimes, I think about fears as falling into sort of two categories, right? There's the fears that save us and the fears that stop us. Right? And so your mother saw the fear of horses, it sounds like, as a fear that could save you.

Beth Webb (16:40.046)


Beth Webb (16:50.252)

Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.

Aransas Savas (16:51.021)

She was like, don't let something bad happen to my baby. And as a mother, I get this. And I question it every day. Am I instilling in my kids fears that save them or stop them? Look both ways when you cross the street, yes. That saves you. Be afraid of walking across the street because someday you might get hit by a car. That's a fear that stops you. And so it's a fine line.

Aransas Savas (17:20.537)

And I think what you are doing, both through your journey with the horse, but also through all these other fears that you have been facing, is you're parsing out which ones are the ones that save you and which ones are the ones that stop you.

Beth Webb (17:35.830)

Right, right. And I find, too, that sometimes they can be one-offs. Sometimes we can build a little bit of confidence and gain a little empowerment by a tiny one-off. Let's say you're afraid to go sing karaoke. And you do it once, and you're done. You don't have to go do it every week. Right? Ta-da. But sometimes it's a fear that lingers and you have to keep reminding yourself that you're capable. I can do this. Right. I mean, there's that old saying that, you know, if you think you can or you think you can't, you're right. So every single day I have to get up and I remind myself that I can, I can.

Aransas Savas (18:26.881)

Yeah. And what do you say to yourself to keep facing it? Because if I went and I sang karaoke once and I was like, oh wow, this is true story. I'm terrible at karaoke, why would I do that again? That's not fair to myself or the people listening. There's not a lot of pleasure or satisfaction that makes me hunger for more.

And I'm sure that first time you went for a horse ride and it's not like you rode off into the sunset, right? So how do you keep going back?

Beth Webb (19:02.126)


Beth Webb (19:05.750)

Well, you keep going back because every single time you do it, you build confidence. And the more confidence you have, the more empowered you are, the more empowered you are, the more you can inspire someone else. Right. And, you know, my idea of what an uplifter is, is someone who can find joy in helping someone else succeed.

Beth Webb (19:33.278)

So if I can help someone else succeed by doing something myself, by getting over a certain fear, or not even getting over it, but by pushing through it, by doing something meaningful, it's going to then, like a domino effect, inspire somebody else.

Aransas Savas (19:56.321)

And I think there are, I think in most of these cases, what we find is that people need an intrinsic and an extrinsic motivator. And so you have this extrinsic motivation of impact and purpose in helping others. So that is both intrinsic and extrinsic and that it's satisfying you and it's helping other people. What's the difference?

Beth Webb (20:04.607)


Aransas Savas (20:19.361)

What's like the dream vision you hold for yourself? What's the best possible outcome that could happen as a result of you sticking with this dream?

Beth Webb (20:21.814)


Beth Webb (20:31.554)

The best possible outcome is I can walk up to my horse at any point. I am competent enough to saddle him by myself, to put the bit in his mouth, that's one I'm working on right now, getting over, and get up on him by myself, right? Because there it is, that independence, that by myself, by myself. I love asking for help when I need help.

Beth Webb (21:00.566)

But I want to only ask for help for a period of time until I can do it myself. And so the goal is to be able to do all of it myself. This independence, this freedom, this ability to navigate the horse world as a southwestern cowgirl. There you go.

Beth Webb (21:30.518)

And I will tell you this coming weekend, not only am I standing next to a horse, I will be participating in my first three-day cattle drive. And if I can do that Aransas, anybody can do anything.

Aransas Savas (21:43.699)

Oh my goodness.

Aransas Savas (21:48.785)

Oh my goodness. That's huge.

Beth Webb (21:53.694)

Yeah, it is. And the other thing I have to say, though, is it doesn't always have to be this huge. It can be little things. It can be little things, right? It can be as much as just taking the brush and brushing him for a day. So we have to be OK with some days it's some things, and some days it's other things.

Beth Webb (22:21.202)

And take the confidence away to whatever our ability is that particular day.

Aransas Savas (22:27.985)

Mm-hmm. And I think so much of what I hear in your approach to this, it is very much about celebrating the moments. Yeah, so it's these little signals of progress and change. Oh, and as humans, most of us are so bad at that.

Beth Webb (22:39.027)

100 percent.

Aransas Savas (22:54.797)

We're so good at dismissing our progress and being like, eh, didn't count, doesn't happen, wasn't the way I pictured it.

Beth Webb (22:58.134)


Beth Webb (23:02.622)

Right. But see, if we put our mindset into a participant mindset, I'm doing this. I'm doing this right in the moment. I'm doing this. I'm touching this horse. I'm riding this horse. I'm doing it. And it's that shift between being an observer and then becoming a participant.

Aransas Savas (23:19.185)


Aransas Savas (23:21.889)

and being a participant. Ah, that's so good.

Beth Webb (23:25.614)

There's nothing more empowering than becoming a participant in whatever it is that you find joy in.

Aransas Savas (23:34.961)

And it's a practice.

Beth Webb (23:36.194)

Yes. Yes.

Aransas Savas (23:39.573)

I think the thing that is really striking me about your story at this moment is the fact that this act of courage is the culmination of many acts of courage and lots of fears faced.

Beth Webb (23:52.554)

Yes. Yes, yes. And being told that you can't do that. And saying, yes, I can. Turning the narrative, saying, yes, I can. Women need to turn the narrative and do whatever they want to do.

Aransas Savas (24:00.046)

Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.

Aransas Savas (24:11.682)

Mm-hmm. And what did that shift for you to be able to say, oh, yeah, I can, I just proved it to myself?

Beth Webb (24:21.286)

It's the minute you stop caring what other people think. It's the minute you realize that you don't have to stay in somebody else's box that they've built around you. You can build your own boxes. And we do! We put up our own walls and our own limits. We don't need other people's limits on top of that.

Aransas Savas (24:25.698)


Beth Webb (24:46.674)

So as soon as you let go of those things, then you can try these other things. And for me, it hasn't just been horses. It's been one thing after another. You know, I do lots of crazy things. And sometimes they're for the moment, and sometimes they become a real passion that stay with us. But we'll never know what brings us joy unless we try things. So we have to be open.

Aransas Savas (25:13.829)

Did you always know that you had that courage to face your fear?

Beth Webb (25:16.210)

No, no, no. It wasn't until much later in life. I knew I had a lot of anger, and I knew I had a lot of gumption. But I didn't know that it was OK to just go do things. Because that might be selfish, or that might be looked at as frivolous, or unladylike, or.

Beth Webb (25:45.258)

Whatever. And you let go of those labels. You just let go of it.

Aransas Savas (25:51.765)

I love that you use those words because I think those stories are the ones we hear in the back of our minds and we trust as truth. It's not ladylike. People don't do that. It's selfish. And believing those is what actively stops us.

Beth Webb (26:13.650)

100%. Yes.

Aransas Savas (26:17.101)

And so the second we challenge them, we hear stories like yours that say, oh, yeah, you can be happier, freer, more authentic, more purposeful, more impactful, more whatever you value and want to be more of in your life when you let go of those old limiting stories and experiment with being the things that you always wanted to be.

Beth Webb (26:49.210)

Exactly, exactly. Yeah, yeah. And you never know unless you try.

Aransas Savas (26:58.345)

I think that's so important. So let's talk about that a bit more for a second. So one of the things that I think you are really saying with your story is I'm gonna face all my fears and I'm gonna do things that I may or may not actually wanna keep doing.

Beth Webb (27:14.254)

Correct, yes. And there's been instances when I haven't kept doing things. And that's OK, too, because sometimes we dive headfirst into something and we think, oh, boy, I've invested so much time, energy, money, I better keep doing it. I'll give you an example. I also got really, really into off-roading. And I decided I was going to learn everything there was about the mechanics of a Jeep.

Aransas Savas (27:19.343)

Uh huh.

Beth Webb (27:42.858)

Right? And so I'm underneath my Jeep on my garage floor turning wrenches at one point. Right? Like a crazy lady. And yes, I had a lot of fun doing the overlanding and going out on the trails. And that would scare me to death because I'd go up on these shelf trails that were way up high. And at one point, I was.

doing something out in the garage, and I was like, I don't want to do this anymore. I'll still go ride, and I'll go do the trials and stuff, but I don't want to turn wrenches. I don't have to prove anything with that. So there was an example of I gave it a whirl. I know what I know now because I took that step, but I'm not going to become a mechanic. And that's OK.

Aransas Savas (28:14.304)

Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.

Aransas Savas (28:36.409)

Right. But it wasn't time wasted. No. And I think you're so right. We've, again, like that selfish story that so many women are told that stops them. There is this, well, if I do it, I'll be wasting time or resources or no, I think what you're telling us.

Beth Webb (28:38.835)


Beth Webb (28:43.626)

Right. Mm-hmm.

Beth Webb (28:52.331)

Mm-hmm. It's an investment.

Aransas Savas (28:55.733)

Yes, it's all an investment. And that knowledge now is yours. That understanding is now yours. That understanding of that culture and the people who do that is now yours. And it's going to inform what you do next. There's a good chance that something you learned in off-roading, maybe about balance, is now going into your experience of horses. So it's cumulative wisdom.

Beth Webb (28:57.686)


Beth Webb (29:05.942)

Right. Right.

Beth Webb (29:13.419)

Right. Yep.

Beth Webb (29:22.554)

100 percent.

Aransas Savas (29:22.817)

It just may not be used in the way that we expected. So, so, so important, Beth.

Beth Webb (29:27.742)

Yes, yes, yep, yep, it's okay. It's okay to dive in and it's okay to climb out. Ha ha ha. Ha ha ha.

Aransas Savas (29:35.457)

Ah, I want to just like say that over and over again. It's okay to dive in, it's okay to climb out. And I am one of those people who has less trouble starting than stopping. So I'm a little more fearless about, I'm gonna experiment, I'm gonna play. But I'm also super accountable. So once I've done the thing, I'm like, I need to stick with it.

Beth Webb (29:48.282)


Beth Webb (29:53.771)


Beth Webb (29:58.684)


Beth Webb (30:02.059)


Aransas Savas (30:02.533)

I grew up with a very strong finish what you start story. And my work has been to say, I'm finished. I can stop whenever I want to. I don't have to keep going past the point where it's satisfying or fun or helpful or of service in whatever way I need it to be. And that's really been my story with running for the last year. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.

Beth Webb (30:05.879)

100 percent.

Beth Webb (30:14.003)


Beth Webb (30:25.438)

Right. When something stops being of service in your life, when it no longer empowers you to a point where you're getting anything out of it anymore, you don't need to keep doing it.

Aransas Savas (30:39.377)

going. Yeah. Yeah. It's okay to start. It's okay to stop. That's right. And I mean, the the key really here is to give ourselves the freedom to follow our curiosity. And that freedom comes with knowing that we don't have to be good at it. We don't have to find our life's purpose in it. We don't have to.

Beth Webb (30:40.718)

It's okay, ladies, stop.

Beth Webb (30:45.142)


Beth Webb (30:57.547)


Beth Webb (31:08.533)


Aransas Savas (31:09.913)

change everything because of this, but the work is just showing up.

Beth Webb (31:17.922)

Yes. Yep. Participate.

Aransas Savas (31:20.441)

Yeah, participate. That word is so good.

Beth Webb (31:25.150)

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Because when you're participating, you have to be in the moment. You have to intentionally be there. It's not like the world is just happening around you. It's your part of it.

Aransas Savas (31:27.450)


Aransas Savas (31:34.477)


Aransas Savas (31:41.073)

Well, and I think, too, we throw around the word presence a lot. And I spent a long time not really understanding what it meant. I have a very strong relationship to it now, and I have a very strong meaning associated with it. But to me, when we're talking about participating, we're really talking about presence. When you talk about brushing the horse's mane, and you talk about

being in the fear with the horse, all of that is simply presence.

Beth Webb (32:14.898)

Yes. Yeah.

Aransas Savas (32:17.025)

It's not letting our lives slip by, counting the days until we die, spending our lives looking backwards at what we wish had been different or looking ahead at what we hope will happen, but it's being a full participant and being fully actively engaged in what is.

Beth Webb (32:21.670)

Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.

Beth Webb (32:36.670)

Yeah, in the choices we make. Instead of the choices that others make for us, we need to own our choices and be in those moments.

Aransas Savas (32:47.121)

Mm-hmm, mm-hmm. So well said. So one of the things we love to do on this episode is wrap up each episode on this podcast, is wrap up each episode with what we call a lightning round. So, welcome to the Uplifter lightning round, Beth. What's one quick way you raise your own energy?

Beth Webb (33:11.346)

Nature. Immediately get outside. Yeah.

Aransas Savas (33:13.833)

Yeah. And it's instant for you.

Beth Webb (33:18.610)

Yeah, give me mountains, give me a storm. Yeah.

Aransas Savas (33:24.561)

It's interesting you picked such intense experiences of nature. One easy way you boost other women.

Beth Webb (33:32.674)

Oh, I intentionally, whenever I am out anywhere, I make a point to say something I like about them, whether it's, oh, I love your hair, oh, I like your earrings, that shirt looks so beautiful on you, like restaurants, in line at the bank, whatever it is, if we on purpose uplift women, you never know how that might make their day just a little bit different.

Aransas Savas (33:58.181)

Yeah, and it forges an instant connection, doesn't it, when people feel seen like that? Yeah. And especially when we feel like we can authentically do it. It is a beautiful challenge, I think, to say, what do I admire about this person? I did an experiment for a while, as I would walk through Manhattan on my way to work each morning, to admire something about every person I passed. And it was so interesting what I could find in people who were like,

Beth Webb (34:00.930)

Mm-hmm. Yeah. Yep.

Beth Webb (34:12.831)


Beth Webb (34:21.482)


Aransas Savas (34:26.969)

yelling at someone on the street. I was like, I wonder what I could possibly admire about this person who is belittling someone. And I would find something, whether it was just that they woke up this morning, or they had the courage to wear that vibrant headset. Exactly. Yes, to express their anger instead of holding it in. And something really powerful happens when we look for admiration in others. Yeah, they do.

Beth Webb (34:36.780)


Beth Webb (34:42.368)

I like their intensity.

Beth Webb (34:49.372)


Beth Webb (34:51.850)

Yeah, and everybody has something.

Aransas Savas (34:56.825)

Truly, one little way that you elevate your community, the planet or the world.

Beth Webb (35:04.626)

Ooh, so community is really important to me. And one of the things that I started doing when I moved here was I began like a little group of women, all different ages.

Beth Webb (35:19.158)

all different backgrounds, some even speaking different languages. We all got together for wine one evening and made connections, made connections, made community, introduced each other. And it has been such a beautiful, uplifting thing to watch the relationships. Bud, from just this one little meeting of women, it is amazing. When you put five, six, seven women together,

Aransas Savas (35:31.258)


Beth Webb (35:49.078)

What can happen just the way that they all have connected and grown our community as women together? I just, yeah, that was, and anybody can do that. You just start a little wine club. Yeah.

Aransas Savas (36:04.001)

Mm. Yeah, and I think what's really smart about that, for anybody who's listening to Beth and thinking, I want that, she started with something really accessible. She didn't start with like, do you want to go deep and make a new set of friends? But who wants to meet for a glass of wine? And then created the conditions. And these conditions were, let's have a very real conversation, it sounds like. Let's introduce ourselves to one another in a meaningful way. And

Beth Webb (36:18.059)


Beth Webb (36:21.414)


Beth Webb (36:28.778)


Aransas Savas (36:32.937)

That's no different in some ways than how you approached facing your fear of horses. You said, let me find a safe space, someone to connect with who can help guide me through this. And then you created the conditions for getting to know the horse and building that relationship there.

Beth Webb (36:41.975)


Beth Webb (36:50.946)


Beth Webb (36:56.158)

Look for the uplifters. They're always there.

Aransas Savas (36:58.521)

Yeah, they are. They're all around us. So tell us about a woman who inspires you, Beth.

Beth Webb (37:05.694)

One of the ladies I've met out here, her name is Alexis Nelson, and she is in our military, and she signs up for the craziest assignments. She just got back from Norway, where she plunged into freezing water and slept in tents out in the snow. And

Beth Webb (37:29.858)

You know, we had a conversation one time and she said, yes, I'm totally afraid when I do these things, but we do them anyway. So Alexis, she's my shout out, she's my hero. Anybody who does something, even though they're afraid is my inspiration.

Aransas Savas (37:50.565)


Aransas Savas (37:53.349)

Yes. Thank you for saying that. I think there's so much shame around fear. I'm afraid of driving. I'm afraid of, I'm just going to list all of my own, afraid of singing karaoke now that you reminded me of it. I'm afraid of speaking other languages to people who speak them better than me. I was afraid of weightlifting. I'm still afraid of it sometimes.

Beth Webb (37:59.398)


Beth Webb (38:08.161)


Beth Webb (38:15.606)

I'm sorry.

Aransas Savas (38:21.093)

I have so many fears. I could probably, if I sat here, come up with 30 other fears. We all have fears. So the goal is not to be without fear.

Beth Webb (38:24.942)


Beth Webb (38:31.006)

Right, right, it's to do it anyway. Yeah.

Aransas Savas (38:34.561)

Yeah. Yeah, that is courage.

Aransas Savas (38:41.005)

And that's what we're working toward here, not to be fearless, but to be people who courageously face fears in our own ways. Mm-hmm. Yes.

Aransas Savas (40:41.837)

So not just experts and horses, because my 12-year-old, yesterday, asked my husband, because we live in New York, my kids have spent very little time in their lives in cars, she was like, how do you drive, Daddy? And he was like, well, there's a gas pedal and a brake pedal. But how do you even answer that question? And the truth is, I don't know how to tell somebody to drive, because I'm OK at driving.

Beth Webb (40:59.563)

I'm sorry.

Aransas Savas (41:09.769)

I'm not an expert at teaching driving. So I think that's where it's looking for the experts

Aransas Savas (42:24.401)

Mm-hmm. Yes. And it's part of the journey. And I think I can't imagine that we will ever do an episode of the Uplifters podcast where we don't say these journeys have ups and downs. And if we only expect the ups, then we'll probably stop.

Beth Webb (42:38.048)

Mmm. Mm-hmm.

Aransas Savas (42:48.493)

And so we have to normalize and accept that the downs are a part of the process. The failures, the frustrations, the hiccups, the things that don't go well, are as essential to progress as the things that go well. Yeah.

Beth Webb (42:56.182)


Beth Webb (43:00.266)

Right. Exactly.

Beth Webb (43:08.642)

Hmm. Yes, here's to participating.

Aransas Savas (43:13.221)

Here's to participating. Yeah. I don't want to be an observer in my life. I want to be an active participant. And I think most of us do. It gives life meaning and purpose and passion and energy. And that means succeeding and failing and all the things in between. And hearing your story.

Aransas Savas (43:43.317)

reminds us all that the fear is just a part of that process. And it is a starting place for growth and limitless potential. Yeah. Thank you so much, Beth, for sharing your story. Are there any other key takeaways that I'm missing that you feel like we need to?

Beth Webb (43:54.328)


Beth Webb (43:58.050)


Aransas Savas (44:13.014)

re-emphasize when it comes to facing fears.

Beth Webb (44:16.698)

I think we just need to invite Aransas to come sing karaoke.

Aransas Savas (44:21.613)

No, I will do it. I will do it. I will sing loud and proud and badly and probably with lots of caveats, which I'm working on. But I will do it. Maybe even someday on this show. Oh gosh, that would be terrifying. Okay, here's to doing the scary stuff. Here's to growing. And here's to surrounding ourselves with the people who do this.

Beth Webb (44:28.848)


Beth Webb (44:32.869)


Beth Webb (44:42.225)

Yeah, yeah. Here's to facing fears. Yes.

Aransas Savas (44:49.153)

Right, like if we surround ourselves with people who are constantly saying, stop, you might hurt yourself. Stop, this might go badly. Stop, this isn't what you were supposed to do. Stop, this is not what little ladies are expected to do. We will stop again and again and again and again and again. And we will never believe that we are capable of anything else. And if we surround ourselves with people like you, Beth.

Beth Webb (45:11.879)


Aransas Savas (45:19.409)

If we surround ourselves by the uplifters, the people who are doing it, who are falling off and getting back onto horses.

Beth Webb (45:23.720)


Beth Webb (45:27.054)


Aransas Savas (45:29.605)

then we will believe that we can too. Because like I said, fear is contagious but so is uplifting.

Beth Webb (45:33.123)


Beth Webb (45:36.966)

Absolutely. Absolutely.

Aransas Savas (45:39.849)

And so for all of you listening, I hope you will join us over at the where you can be surrounded by the voices of courageous, fearful, overcoming fears, facing fears, uplifters, the people who prove to us through their actions, their lives, and their stories that

Aransas Savas (46:10.325)

It's okay to let go of the limiting beliefs and the old stories and experiment and in the great words of Beth, participate. So please share this show if it means something to you. We are so much stronger. And so much braver. Together.

The Uplifters
The Uplifters
This podcast is dedicated to celebrating the Uplifters.
In every episode, we share the tools and strategies Uplifters use to take care of themselves.
You'll hear the deeply personal stories of inspiring women who have worked through challenges to create big, joyful lives; how blocks and barriers became tools for success; and powerful mindset techniques you can use to live up. 💫