I stood at the edge of the ocean this morning, watching as the waves rushed toward shore in that familiar rhythm that somehow never gets old. What caught my attention wasn't the crash and foam (though there was plenty of that after Friday’s gusts), but the moment right before—that brief pause where the water seems to gather itself, building potential energy before committing to the shore.
There's something so powerful about that pause. It's not hesitation, exactly. More like... preparation. The ocean knows what it's doing.
I've been thinking a lot about those pauses lately. The spaces between action where we gather ourselves, not out of fear, but in service of what comes next. They're easy to miss in our rush toward visible progress, but I'm learning they might be where the real magic happens.
In last week's episode, I had the joy of speaking with Jessica Varian Carroll about the courage to ask for help. What struck me most in our conversation wasn't just her incredible journey from struggling single mom to successful entrepreneur (though that's incredibly inspiring), but how she described her relationship with vulnerability and invitation.
"For me, it was getting a 9 to 5, you get married, you buy a house," she told me about her early mindset. But when faced with raising four kids alone with limited resources, she discovered that reaching out—making invitations and asking for support—wasn't a weakness but a profound strength. "I was like, I don't deserve this help... This help is needed by others." And now she’s the person helping others get the help they need when they need it most.
Her story hit me —partly because I recognized myself in that hesitation. How many times have I resisted asking for help when I truly needed it? How often have I filled every available minute trying to do it all myself because pausing to reach out felt too risky? What about the risks of not reaching out?
Last month, I decided to experiment with intentional invitations in my own work and life. Nothing dramatic—just reaching out to someone whose perspective might help with a project I was stuck on. Writing a note to a friend who'd been on my mind. Making a specific ask when I needed support instead of hoping someone would notice my struggle.
The results have been... illuminating. (And challenging! My gosh, putting myself in that vulnerable position of asking directly for what I want or need some days feels like training for an emotional marathon.) But I'm noticing that the connections that follow these invitations have more depth, more authenticity. The collaborations feel richer. The outcomes, more aligned with what truly matters.
I'm curious:
Where in your life might you benefit from making a brave invitation or request?
What's one tiny experiment you could try this week to reach out when you'd normally go it alone?
How might your definition of courage expand if you valued vulnerability as much as self-sufficiency?
If you missed last week's conversation with Jessica Varian Carroll (Episode 104), I highly recommend giving it a listen. Her insights about the courage to ask for help and the power of invitation might just shift how you think about vulnerability in your own life. Listen to Episode 104 here.
I've started collecting examples of "courageous asks" from our community. If you have a story about a time when asking for help was the bravest thing you did, reply to this email—I'd love to hear it!
I believe in us,
Aransas
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