Am I Being Selfish?

Selfish.

Roll that word around in your mouth a couple of times. What comes up? How about this one?

Self-centered.

What is with those antonyms? Why is putting ourselves first the opposite of considerate, generous, altruistic, and unselfish?

What if the exact opposite is true? The most lit-up Uplifters, the ones making the biggest impact, have built their work of caring for others around their own needs, not the other way around.

Now, Psychology Today might call this self-awareness, but to me, it feels more like self-centeredness. And you know what? I think that's okay. Actually, I think it's more than okay – it might just be the key to sustainable impact and purpose.

Here's my hot take: I put meeting my needs at the center, and once those are met, I have more capacity for caring for others, not less.

But I get it. Most of us have heard loud and clear that caring for ourselves is greedy. It's selfish. It's bad.

Well, I say it's time for a rebellion. I want to reclaim the words selfish and self-centered. I want them to be known as keys to service, sustainable impact, and purpose – not barriers to them.

As I was pondering this radical idea, I stumbled upon this video from

The School of Life, Applied

that makes a case for why we should be more selfish.

In my mind, the shift from selflessness to self-centeredness looks something like this:

See the difference? In the first image, 'self' is an afterthought, buried under a mountain of other priorities. In the second, 'self' is the radiant center, the sun from which all other actions and impacts emanate.

This isn't about ignoring others or becoming narcissistic. It's about recognizing that when we're at our best – well-rested, fulfilled, energized – we have so much more to give to the world.

So, my dear Uplifters, I have a challenge for us this week:

1. Reflect on one area where you've been putting yourself last. How has this affected your energy and ability to serve others?

2. Now, imagine what it would look like to put yourself at the center in this area. What needs of yours would you meet first?

3. Take one small action to prioritize yourself in this area. Notice how it affects your capacity to care for others.

4. Share your experience! I'd love to hear how this shift feels for you. Does it increase your capacity to uplift others, or does it present unexpected challenges?

This isn't about becoming self-absorbed. It's about becoming self-nurturing so that we can show up more fully for others and for our purpose.

I'd also love to hear how others see this. Do you agree? Disagree? Have a different perspective altogether? Hit reply and let me know your thoughts!

With love, admiration, and only a dash of rebellious spirit, let's keep rising higher together ✨,

Aransas

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Your Next Uplifter

Our next episode of The Uplifters Podcast is headed your way on Thursday, featuring Taylor Scott, founder of RVA Community Fridges, the first community fridges in the state of Virginia! Taylor was nominated by the amazing Caroline Scruggs from episode 48.

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